Give it up.

There was this one time when I was little that I colored all over myself with sharpies. I took off all my clothes except my diaper and just marked everywhere. My mom proceeded to take my picture as I stood red-faced and crying, bottom lip poked out, standing in the kitchen. She said I immediately began to cry when she walked around the corner. I was caught...I knew what I had done was bad. I like to look back at that picture. I think that it is funny that my mom took the time to get her camera while I stood, wailing, in the kitchen. I wish I remember what was going through my head the whole time I was drawing on my body. I wish I remember the whole thing. If I could assume, I would say that I knew it was bad the whole time, but I did it anyway. Isn't that the way life always is. We do things that we know are wrong, but it really isn't until we get caught (or think we are going to get caught) that we cry and cause a scene. We think that we might can get out of it if we appear as though we are sorry, as though we are ashamed and worthy of grace. But, the thing is, is that we are never truly "worthy" of grace. When we are caught in a situation, red-handed so to speak, we are "caught" because we have done something wrong. And, even though we are not worthy of grace, God gives it to us anyway. Every time we mess up, every time we sin, every time we completely color all over ourselves with sharpies, God takes it all away if we ask him to. You know, my mom says that I had to stay in the bathtub all afternoon to get most of the sharpie off. She says that she had to keep letting the cold water out and filling it up with warm water. But, after staying in the tub all afternoon and getting a good scrubbing by Mom, I still had traces of sharpie. It had to wear off. When I sin, when I totally fall on my face, God makes it all go away--if I ask him to, if I ask him for forgiveness. He leaves no traces of it on my soul. Only he can wash it clean. When I try to take care of things on my own, it is like the sharpies...it never fully goes away.

We have to give our burdens to the Lord. We must. He, and only he, can take away our pain and our mistakes. James 5:13-16

BB.